Final Fantasy X: Memories of Struggle
by Kireyna
Summary: This story is about the early lives of the character's from FFX. It starts from their childhood and will end shortly after the game begins.


Author's Note: This is a fanfic about Final Fantasy X. The story will describe the early lives of the main characters from that game. It will end shortly after the game begins. Even those of you who have never played the game will still understand this story. If you have not yet played FFX and are planning on playing it, there are not significant spoilers in this fanfic. Keep in mind, however, that some information is revealed but it does not have any influential effects in the storyline of the game. Final Fantasy and all characters are owned by Squaresoft and Enix. This fanfic is not to be sold, rented, or in any other way used for profit. Ha! Now you can't sue me! If you would like to have a copy of this for your own personal use, please contact me first at himitsu459@netscape.net  
  
Final Fantasy X  
Memories of Struggle  
  
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"Destruction, Death. Will it ever end? It has begun so it must end! But...when it does stop, what will there be left to live for? All the girls and boys will be grown up but their families and friends will be gone.", wept a young girl, reading from her diary in a damp, stale cavern.  
Countless have been killed. And that is only including those who have tried to stop it. Summoners live and die. Guardians live and die. Nothing is static...except Sin. People live only for their ultimate demise. If you know you're going to die and you know your life will be in vain, what is the point? A false sense of hope? Yes, hope. Maybe the next Calm will last forever.  
"What's wrong child? Everything will be okay!" A scraped and bleeding mother asked to a crying child.  
"Don't lie! I'm sick of lies. We're going to die!" wailed the young girl, almost unintelligibly.  
"You shouldn't say that, darling. I have faith that we'll be okay" responded the mother, a tear running down her eye at the fact that a girl, no older than eight, is already accepting death.  
"Well, I've lost my faith" said the girl, a little calmer.  
The older woman sighed, "What do you expect me to do?"  
"...Give it back," squeaked the child, holding back her tears.  
  
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Chapter 1 To love is to perish.  
  
One year after the last attack of Sin. Everyone's spirits are just beginning to rebuild. The land was being rebuilt as well. One such province was in dire need of defense against Sin and, therefore, was badly destroyed. Over time it would be restored, but Sin would once again rain destruction.  
She clutched to her dolls, rocking back and forth on her bed, lost in thought. Her eyes randomly leered back and forth as she sorted out her memories.  
"It's not fair. Life isn't fair. Will you help me? You deserve no help. Why, mommy? You're different..." a girl quietly repeated to herself, recalling thoughts. She has no support from anyone. No help, nothing to back her up.  
"Get down here and eat now or you won't!" yelled a voice from downstairs. She would go down, but not to eat.  
The long black-haired girl marched downstairs, clutching her doll to ease the burning sensation in her fingertips.  
"Go to the table. Your food is getting c-" The girls father exclaimed until he was cut off.  
"I'm not listening to you! I'm...leaving!" yelled the girl, tears trailing from her eyes. Her father just glared as he slowly stood up and began walking towards her. His look was that of a Lynxaur stalking it's prey.  
"You're only twelve!" her father roared. It was the same answer the last time she asked. The girl began to speak until she felt the pain from the back of her fathers hand upon her cheek.  
She bounded back from the force, her tears falling onto the ground. 'Idiot. Freak. Worthless. Stay away from me! I hate you! I never want to see you again!' Thoughts raced through her mind. She felt scorching heat and freezing cold all at once. She didn't want to run back upstairs as she normally did. Suddenly, her mother arrived. Mom's are supposed to make everything better, right?  
"Lulu, when you're older you can leave Mela and have your own life. But, until then, I want a loving daughter." said her mother, calmly.  
Nothing is better. It's just the same thing day after day. So many times she had this argument. So many times has she lost.  
Mela, a very reformed province. They have been stuck in the past due to beliefs. Apparently, their gods restrict machina and magic. The only thing to defeat Sin the gods restrict. Yevon's teachings, also banned, state that Sin attacks due to man's past mistakes. The use of artificial intelligence and magic are weaknesses in man. It is said that Sin will only attack those provinces who show this weakness. Mela contradicts this claim. Sin will attack everyone just due to one province's fault; Perhaps, to provoke war.  
"How could you have a loving daughter if she doesn't love you?" Lulu countered, not expecting a response for she ran upstairs to her room and locked the door. What could she do? Continue living this hell? Lulu sighed. A terrible, despairing life which she managed to get through.  
"At least my dolls love me" lulu whimpered, bringing her Moogle doll to her face. She noticed burnt fabric, like usual, and decided to sew it together again. It was these minor activities that kept her happy. Her parents don't. She knew they wouldn't come upstairs to comfort their daughter.  
Normally people like Lulu are hanged or banished. She is young and has managed to control it, to and extent. Her life has been spared thus far but not without discrimination, hardships, hatred, and the like.  
Even though she was scared, Lulu accepted this ability but only practiced it in secret. She hoped to harness her magic ability to use it to escape Mela and travel to another place. A land where magic is practice, machina used. A far away place where everyone works together to do whatever they can to defeat Sin. Spira.  
Lulu borrowed books from a hidden library she stumbled upon the last time she attempted to run away. She read often, there was nothing else to do, and she learned much. She would've returned the books but, sadly, the library owner was revealed and his shop was burned. The man was stoned to death last week. Lulu was grateful they burned the records of those who borrowed books as well.  
Lulu spent hours reading about the wondrous advances of Spira. She had also looked over what they do for entertainment. "A popular underwater sport in which player try to get a ball in the opposing teams' goal. Blitzball." Lulu read aloud. "I love the water...It's rare that I get to see the ocean". She began imagining the few times she visited the shore. The cool breeze, reflective blue water. So peaceful. She thought of the warm sand, and how fun swimming was...true freedom. Not following the rules of gravity, being able to just float, care free. So perfect. She imagined herself there, in the ocean, wading through the knee high life sustaining liquid. She knelt down and splashed some water on her face. Outside of her mind, there was just a young child splashing nothingness on herself, content in her own world.  
The thoughts in her mind continued feeling more realistic. So real, she feared opening her eyes. Sweat soon formed on the child's palms. A familiar sensation of pressure started pounding in her head. In the past she felt this, when she would feel overcome with an emotion. Lulu calmed down, ending her imaginary vacation.  
Lulu's fear came true. As she opened her eyes she noticed the clear liquid was not sweat. Sweat doesn't flow freely out of the center of one's palms. The girl stared in awe for sometime, watching water spill of her hand, falling on her tile floor and droplets bouncing up and back down. The vision of her father yelling and her tears splashing on the floor flashed through her mind.  
Quickly, when she noticed the water creed towards her dolls, Lulu snapped out of her thought and closed her hands tightly in a desperation to cease this talent.  
"Please stop. Please stop. Please stop!" Lulu painfully said while her nails were digging into her skin. She screamed the word 'Stop' in her mind, tightening her grip. There was a sharp pain in her palms and blood began mixing with water. The pain overcame her. All she was thinking of was that sensation. Soon, the water ceased. The natural clear liquid, now red, gradually stopped flowing from her hands. It was like turning the faucet of a sink off.  
It was a horror. Lulu slowly opened her hand. They were moist and hurting with small cut marks in the middle, but the water stopped.  
The image was that of a twelve-year-old girl. Slightly ruffled, long black hair, the tips laying on the floor. Light reflected off the water creating distorted images. She was holding up her hands; they were shaking; they were bleeding.  
"What's wrong with me?" Lulu suddenly realized her true power. It all hit her at once.  
The next morning she just lay in bed. She though all night about what previously happened. It first seemed like too much but she would not be scared. Lulu figured if enough skill in controlling it was attained, perhaps escaping from Mela would be easier.  
Lulu was back at the shore. There was a strong breeze, how she wanted it. The ever so beautiful water rippled. Seanix's flew overhead. What if she could fly with them? The wind started to pick up. Imaginary sand whirled up into small spirals around her. The sand separated from her feet as she floated up. Did she become lighter than air? Or had the air dense and become heavier than her? Either way, she soared with the wind. Free. Suddenly she came to the disappointing realization this was all in her mind.  
Her eyes opened and she lay in her bed. Everything was the same. Why could she create water from nothing but was not even able to alter the air around her?  
The sound of footsteps passed through the thing walls. Lulu knew her parents wouldn't be happy knowing she was still in bed. Lulu's door swung open and she quickly pulled the covers up to her neck. The stern glare frightened her until it changed into a look of concern. At least it was not her father.  
"Is anything wrong?", Lulu's mother doubtingly said.  
"I really don't feel good" Lulu falsely croaked, hoping her lie would work. Her mother's eyes narrowed. Did she see through it?  
"Fine. Your father and I are going out for a while. Be safe.", the older woman quickly stated, turned around and left.  
'What just happened?', Lulu thought, stunned. She heard footsteps going downstairs. There was the squawk of a Chocobo and the fleeting sounds of it trotting off.  
She was alone. This was the first time they left her alone. Did they trust her? Did they just no longer care? Lulu decided not to ponder this as she had other things to do.  
Lulu took a box out from under her bed. The large semi-round box contained old clothing mother thought she wanted to keep. It was just a cover up. Pulling the clothing out one by one, she eventually reached the last garment. A purple sweater her grandmother knit in her death bed. Lulu tossed it aside. The remaining contents of the box was a reference book on Yevon and Spira.  
"Magic...Magic...", Lulu said, searching through the index. "Ah...page 401!" she exclaimed. Lulu turned to the page and began reading. "Raw energy borrowed from the environment. Usually it is then used to favor the mage or summoner casting the spell. Once the energy is used it returns to the environment to be drawn upon again." Lulu scanned down, looking for more useful information. "Energy is found in every living object. It is was allows us to be.", she continued. "The energy an object contains is always being used. Energy can be summoned from objects which posses extra amounts of it, or drained from those which don't. This is difficult to perform", Lulu involuntarily nodded as she read. "Once energy is gathered, it must be used quickly as most people can not hold more energy than which already exists in them. Altering this source of power is easy, as long as you have a clear state of mind. After a mage feels the pressure of energy inside them, they must imagine it being released from a specific point of their body. Some, however, prefer using a staff, or any object, which accentuates the magic ability", Lulu sighed. But how do you gather energy in the first place?", she flipped to the next page and read.  
"There isn't a specific way to summon energy. Usually those who have the natural ability of a magic user accidentally used it at on time in their lives. This may have been caused by high stress or a very heavy emotion of some kind. Mages and Summoners who experienced this have claimed they think back to that time. Once the pressure of energy returns, the user must think of a type of element to associate it with. The most commonly used elements are Fire, Water, Electricity, and Ice. Other, more difficult types of elements, are Order, Time, and Chaos. Not much is known about these magicks except that Order is used in healing." Lulu paused, as she absorbed what was learned. She decided to close the book until she noticed a small paragraph which was partially crossed out. In her attempt to read it, she deciphered " Another...used by Sin...destructive....only those destined...may be able...by sacrificing....can use....non-elemental." Lulu disregarded that mysterious text and closed the book. She hopped onto her bed, getting into a comfortable position.  
"Fire, Water, Electricity, Ice. The four elements", Lulu recited to herself. She closed her eyes and remembered...Shut up! Go to your room. I was never your friend...She though of those times...How could you? Please stop. Why did you have to be our daughter?! Her head was pounding. She was holding back tears. Lulu thought of lightning, imagining thunderstorms. She loved the rain. What was that place? The Thunder Plains? Yes, that was it. A desert of perpetual storms.  
Her fingers twitched, there was a bit of a shocking feeling in her palm. Was this it? She opened her eyes, concentrating on that sensation. It was amazing. Electricity was coursing around her hand and between her fingers. It was not controlled. Lulu began to panic, her hand started stinging. She forced her hand into a cup shape. The electricity soon transformed into a sphere at her wish. That was the easy part, now to use it. Her eyes searched for a place to release this energy.  
"An electrical appliance. That should work." The novice mage through. She spotted a audio recorder and focused on it. Energy was building, muscles were straining. Lulu thrust her hand forward and brightness leapt out.  
The electricity flashed through air and struck the audio recorder. Music began for a moment but was replaced with a high-pitched whirring sound and then a small explosion as pieces of the device rattled, falling apart.  
Lulu's eyes were wide as she stared. Her hand were shaking, her muscles hurt, she destroyed an appliances, yet was smiling. A red light suddenly caught her eye. Lulu gasped. "Fire!", she instinctively said, forgetting no one else was home. Sparks which flew from the device must have lit her school papers. The panicky girl stumbled off her bed and dashed for the stairway. The fire was growing but Lulu just paused in the doorway.  
"What if..." Lulu trailed off. She turned around, squinted her eyes at the burnt paper, still charring. Lulu smiled once again, raising her hands and closing her eyes. Now she was a mage, and flooded her mind with the thought of water. It was easier now. She hadn't expected to acquire skill this quickly. First was the pounding, then tingling sensations in her hands, finally she opened her eyes. It was wrong. There was water, but it was freely draining from her hands; But it was still enough. Lulu held her palms above the flames, soon causing them to wink out. She clenched her hands and replaced the through of water with 'Stop'. It soon receded.  
"What went wrong?" Lulu wondered, wiping her hands. The young mage thought of when she summoned electricity. "I didn't form it into a sphere" Lulu exclaimed, answering her own question. Apparently forming energy into a shape also controls the amount used.  
Lulu immediately began packing. Sure, she may be a novice mage, but living on her own would be the easiest and safest way to practice. It was odd the emotion of fear, living on her own, didn't overwhelm her. Her parents have been gone for 2 and a half hours. Lulu had been contemplating whether or not she should leave a note.  
"Perhaps leaving a message will not conger as much worry" she quietly stated.  
  
'You may have already heard what happened. I hope the guards are okay.  
I know my existence is against Mela so I have left. People like me  
must help fight Sing and I'm going to make a difference. Please don't  
try to find me. You want me to be happy, right? Well, now I am.  
  
Your...loving daughter,  
Lulu.'  
  
The sun was setting and Lulu was ready. She had not a clue where her parents were. She didn't feel guilty either, and the note will explain when they get home. She felt strong. The feeling of fear had almost completely vanished. What does a mage have to fear? You need no weapons...except your mind. Lulu wore a dark purple cloak she found stashed in the back of her mother's closet.  
Something wasn't right. She had planned a inconspicuous route to take but there were very few people outside. Not even guards were at their posts. On her way out of town there was a bright flash of light.  
  
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The creature reared it's head back. It paused, then thrashed. It wanted to run but the pain of swords piercing it's shell informed it to fight.  
"Watch out!" a guard yelled to his companion. A large, muscled, burly, and fortified man flailed backward, stumbling to his knees. The Leepa tilted back on it's hind legs. The man's last sight was that of a four-legged spiked creature. He threw his spear as a last resort but it was futile. Metal recoiled of reinforced carapace. Jagged spines tore through soft flesh. Another grenade was thrown at the creature. The bomb exploded, burning the dead and damaging one of the Leepa's legs. It knelt, realigning it's remaining three legs to stand once again. A young girl arrived. She seemed out of place, so clean and pure in the midst of the dead and dying.  
Lulu stood in fear. Her eyes began wavering as she held back tears. A guard caught her eye. His post was normally at the front gate. She noticed fear in his eyes. What could be so great as to strike fear in someone like that? The guard reached forward, motioning for Lulu to leave. He opened his mouth to yell; Blood flowed out. The guards body began to tremble. He looked down in, seeing the pincer through his chest.  
  
Another sight of a corpse being flung into the darkened sky.  
  
"Don't quit now", An older warrior said, breathing heavily while holding his stomach. He ran, squeezing the hilt of his sword. "Almost there..."the man continued.  
The complex figure of a creature came into Lulu's view. She didn't have time to think. Lulu could just flee. She ran to the side of the creature and darted past it. The spider-like monster followed her, not moving as fast due to it's one less limb.  
Lulu's cloak caught on a broken branch. The wind was temporarily knocked out of her when she fell. As Lulu stood up she saw herself. A reflection appeared in the saliva and muddy-water-covered shell-leg of the creature. That reflection was of a innocent girl...awaiting her doom. She was for frozen in fear under the belly of this beast.  
"My journey has already come to an end" Lulu thought, closing her eyes, accepting death.  
There was a sudden pain in her ribs and the sound of flesh ripping could be heard. Blood began spilling on the cold grass beneath. Lulu hit the ground once again, keeping her eyes closed, waiting to die.  
"Nothing is happening. Is it supposed to take this long?", Lulu thought. Soon, the pain in her side began to dull. She opened her eyes and was shocked by the sight.  
A middle-aged man with his sword digging into a demonic creature was what Lulu saw. He pushed a girl to the ground. He had known that too much force was used, but his body was beginning to numb.  
"Father!" The girl yelled, breaking her trance. The man had a gash across his stomach, was dirtied from head to boot, and had a complexion of the dead. But his smiled. The last of the creatures fleeting life drained onto the moist grass as well as all over it's slayer. Lulu soon realized her father's true love for his daughter. She felt the warmth of his smile in her heart. However, that smile soon faded.  
The creature wailed. For a last feeling of contentment, it's pincer- claws would claim one more. The Leepa leaned back on two of it's legs but was too weak to steady itself. The lifeless body fell, but not before it's frontal claw collapsed on the brave warrior. Lulu's father was dying quickly. She began to cry at the sight of his pierced and crushed body.  
"Twelve...is old enough..." his last words were.  
She ran. That's all she could do. Her eyes closed and tears running from them, she hadn't been seeing where she was running. Lulu ran into someone. The soldier had a gloomy look on his face.  
"Lulu...your mother...", he began.  
"Mommy!" Lulu thought. She had nearly forgotten. "Where is she?"  
"Lulu, there's something I must tell you" the soldier warmly said. He knelt to meet Lulu's eyes. His face, she recognized his face through the grit that was scattered upon it. Dr. Kadowaki, the one who has been helping Lulu control her...talent. She listened carefully as her doctor continued. "Your mother is very much like you."  
"Well, of course, I'm her daughter" Lulu simply responded.  
"Listen. Your mother is like you in a different way. She was born...", he decided to approach this differently. "There were four Leepa which attacked us. Three of them were defeated by your mother alone", Lulu listened quizzically. "She saved us, but the cost was her life..." The mage's focus drifted. "I know it's hard...So much happening in such a short time...to such a young girl. How else can I say this? There really isn't any way." He paused, allowing the girl to absorb all that has happened. A cool breeze released tension and he felt the dry, flaky blood on his face. It had seemed, for a moment, the world paused as well. "Lulu..." he began, "your mother was a user of magic too."  
"Lulu fell out of her daze and quickly looked Dr. Kadowaki in the eyes. "What?" she asked.  
"Your parents had great importance in this town. In all of Mela, in fact. They left to meet Maester Mika of Spira. It was an important meeting about negotiating rights to the blue prints of certain fighter machina and scrolls of forbidden magic. We were explaining how me gravely required defenses. An enemy must've known of this meeting for creatures suddenly appeared. We retreaded, as well as the Spirian caravan. I hope Maester Mika escaped safely. Four of the Leepa caught up to us. Many people died the first moment. Just as everyone was losing hope there was a bright flash. It was a beautiful sight...she was floating like an angel. The light intensified and then she was gone. An angel sacrificing her existence to save us. Ultimately, to save you" He looked Lulu a bit longer then dropped his gaze downward.  
It was hard for Lulu to be sad. She never had shown much love or interest for her parents. But, they really loved her. She felt guilty for not being more sad.  
"I wish I could tell you everything will be okay but I fear times will just get worse. I suggest leaving. More creatures may come. You are not strong enough to save us now", Dr. Kadowaki paused. "But hopefully in the future you will help defeat Sin"  
Suddenly, she broke. Her throat tightened and all the restrained tears escaped at once. "I'm going to be on my own...I'm scared." For the first time she actually wanted her parents. The first time the wish she was a better daughter crossed her mind.  
Lulu had stopped crying and was wiping the dirt off her clothing.  
"I want to do more, but there isn't anything else" Dr. Kadowaki finally began smiling again.  
"I'll be fine" Lulu replied, sniffling, forgetting about her sadness for now.  
"Spira is the place for you. Use the Gil I gave you to reach the shore and take the S.S. Winno to Spira...be careful" he repeated from before.  
Lulu nodded slowly and the Chocobo began to trot off into the night. She looked back once more, watching her past drift farther and farther away. She righted herself and looked to the distance, gripping the reins. There was the quality of an adult in her now. Part of Lulu thought it was to early to be going through this, but the magical part of her knew that anything can happen. The young mage finally felt special with her ability and glad it had chosen her. Lulu leaned down a bit, pressing her face upon the soft feathers of the large bird. The sun had almost completely set and she began to quietly sob.  
  
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This young mages true story has just begun. There will be many events she will counter that will change the course of her life and perhaps others. Many people will cross her patch to help her, and perhaps some to hurt. During the meantime, there are other people's lives who will soon have an effect on the entire world... 


End file.
